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Writer's pictureKristina Anzell

Navigating Boundaries During the Holidays: A New Mom's Guide

The holiday season can be a magical time for many, and for new moms, there are challenges with a young baby that needs navigating. There might be situations that have never been stressors that now are because you have a little one. Use this guide to explore what these challenges might be and learn some effective strategies for setting boundaries during this season.


Understanding the Challenges of Being a New Mom During the Holidays

Being a new mom during the holidays is a journey filled with wonder, but it comes with its share of challenges. Postpartum experiences and the desire for a peaceful family celebration can create stressors unique to this season. Sleepless nights, struggles with travel, feeding and napping schedules to work around, and just general adjusting to the new normal can make it challenging to fully engage in the normal festivities. Recognizing and acknowledging that this year is going to be different is the first step toward making a holiday experience that keeps your and your babies well-being in mind.


Identifying Priorities for New Moms

The holidays bring a whirlwind of expectations from yourself, your family and your friends. It is crucial for new moms to identify their priorities. This year, you will not be able to meet everyone's expectations and that is okay! A part of being able to enjoy this year is identifying your priorities. This might mean saying no to more invitations than usual or creating new family traditions for your new family. Building in time for rest might be something to consider this year, whether it's a quiet evening at home or a special outing. Find what truly matters, what are your values and how can you have a sense of joy and fulfillment during the holidays around these values. When you have a changing of values, a changing of needs, that also means that there is a change in boundaries. It is imporant to know your boundaries and communicate them with family and friends during the holidays.


Establishing Holiday Boundaries as a New Mom

Setting boundaries for yourself this holiday season is not only to preserve your well-being but is crutial for enjoying your celebration. As we go into recognizing and establishing boundaries, remember that boundaries are placed on you, not on anyone else. When we try and place boundaries around others, we are unable to control the outcome and as doing so, we are setting ourselves up for failure.


Here are some essential aspects to consider when establishing boundaries:


What limits do you have this year?

  • You have a new baby! You are going to have different limits than before having a baby. Take a step back and recognize where your energy, emotions, and tolerance for others is at. Most, if not all moms, have sleep deprivation which comes with lower tolerance, a harder time regulating your emotions and less energy to share with others.

Recognizing Boundaries

Find Ways to Communicate Boundaries


Effective Communication Strategies During the Holidays

Setting boundaries is just one aspect of effective communication. With open Open and honest communication around these boundaries, you will have a greater chance of a successful and enjoyable holiday season for you as a new mom. Effectively expressing your needs, expectations, and desires can lead to a more supportive and understanding environment. Here are some effective communication strategies to consider:


Managing Expectations

  • Part of setting boundaries is setting clear expectations with family and friends about what you can realistically manage during the holidays. Be honest about your capacity and communicate your desire for a more relaxed celebration. Letting people in a little will help lower defenses.

  • Clearly articulate your priorities, whether it's focusing on quiet family moments or participating in specific traditions that hold sentimental value.

Expressing Your Needs

Setting Boundaries Diplomatically


Creating a Realistic Holiday Schedule

Sit down, get out your calander and make a realistic holiday schedule. This will be the key when trying to balance between festive activities and self-care. Build in rest! Start with the things that you need in order to be well, getting a walk in, having time for naps, eating a healthy meal in the morning, getting a good nights sleep. You can then start adding in events, travel time, and celebrations. Make sure you are adding in a little more travel time if this is your first holiday with a little one. Effective time management like this will help you avoid overcommitment and will provide space for the joyful moments that make the season special.


Seeking and Accepting Help

Building a support system is crucial for new moms navigating the holiday season. Don't hesitate to seek help and delegate tasks to trusted friends and family. Embrace the strength of community, whether it's a friend offering a helping hand or a family member assisting with holiday preparations. Accepting help is a sign of strength and allows you to fully enjoy the magic of the season.


Practicing Self-Care During the Holidays

Amidst the hustle and bustle, self-care remains essential for new moms during the holidays. Prioritize moments of rest, nourishment, and mindfulness. Whether it's a quiet cup of tea, a short walk, or a moment of meditation, self-care is a gift you give to yourself and your family. A well-rested and rejuvenated mom is better equipped to savor the holiday festivities.


And remember momma, you are not alone in this journey called motherhood.




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